Bye, Ed
This week a dear friend, Ed Orio, passed away. His family did not publish an obituary that I could find so this is mine for him.
The miraculous and wonderful thing is that I had the chance to see him in Memphis only 2 weeks ago. A little over 3 weeks ago, a partner in the firm's Charlotte office asked me who might be the appropriate person from our office to go with him to try and secure business from a Memphis based company. I asked who he was meeting with and told him that maybe I knew someone in the legal department since I went to undergrad and grad school in Memphis. I was not the person he had originally selected to make this trip but the person he asked had other commitments. He asked if I would go.
Ed lived in Memphis and I immediately wrote him when I knew I would be flying in on Thursday and be available to stay the weekend. I have other friends in town that I really should spend time with but it was really Ed I wanted to see. 23 years ago we lived in the same condo complex and, along with my then boss Carol (who encouraged me to go to law school), we became fast friends. Ed never married but had a vast circle of friends. He helped thousands of students at Memphis State designing their graduate school programs. He remained a very active alum of his college fraternity and was a huge supporter of Memphis State basketball. Despite his many activities and social connections, he always managed to make me feel like I was the most special person in his life when I was with him. He and Carol were at my wedding to Jim 7 years ago and although we didn't talk often, every time we did it, was as if no time had passed.
When I contacted Ed 3 weeks ago, he told me he was supposed to be visiting friends in Indiana when I was coming but he was having a biopsy and depending on the results, he might be in Memphis. He would not tell me what was wrong because he really didn't know himself. He found out a few days later that he had terminal liver cancer with a tumor that was inoperable. He told me "good news - I'll be here when you come and I'll tell you what is going on when you get here." He thought he had about a year to live but there was a new drug they wanted to try to shrink his tumor. It cost $4000 a month and his insurance wold not cover the initial months. His doctors were trying to get the drug company or a non-profit to subsidize the treatments.
God knew that Ed and I needed to see each other one last time. He put us both in Memphis out of the blue. We met for dinner on Friday and talked, laughed, ate, reminisced. He said he was not in any pain. He was very yellow so I knew it was bad but he was the same wonderful Ed. Ed always called me "Babe" with his deep baritone and being with him, I remembered how much I loved that. We had our favorite cheese enchiladas at Molly's and laughed about how I always seem to drop food on myself and how his old dog Dudley bit me in the hip one time and made me afraid of Afghan hounds. He took me to where we used to live. He came back to the hotel and we sat up talking about books and movies and artists and his friends. On Saturday we went to breakfast, he drove me around MSU and Rhodes. We went to the book store and then picked up Carol. We headed downtown to Mud Island and to the Rendezvous for ribs. We drove around mid-town, marveled at the architecture, caught up. Again we laughed and told each other how much we meant to each other and we talked about getting together at the beach in the fall. It was not a good bye visit. I think we all fully expected to see each other again very soon.
Last Saturday, the toxins built up in his body to a point where it affected his brain. He apparently fell into a coma at home and was found Sunday morning. The doctors assured his friends that he did not feel any pain. He passed with his fraternity brothers, dear friends and his sister keeping vigil. I got the call Monday from his very close friend, Joe. I haven't seen or spoken to Joe in at least 20 years but he knew I was special to Ed just as I know about all the special people in Ed's life even though I never met most of them. Dottie - he loved working with you. Beverly - he adored you and your children. Joe and Gary - he loved your trips to St. Louis with Carol at Christmas. Joe, Ed talked on and on about your new dog. Tony and Michelle - Ed was so proud of the two of you and was looking forward to your wedding in a few months. Carol, he loved your sophistication and smarts and your down to earth temperament and sense of humor.
Ed had very high expectations of people but he loved his friends deeply. He did everything with gusto. He loved good food, good music, good art. He loved his school, his town, his family, his co-workers. He introduced me to Mozart and Pavarrati, George Rodrigue and gourmet large crystal brown sugar. He wasn't wild about children but he loved my Marshall. He loved his post-retirment job as the train conductor at the Memphis zoo. He loved the Mid-south fair and tolerated my passion for corn dogs and the freak show. He loved his dog, Dudley the biter, and the dogs of his friends. He loved Halloween as much or more than me. Usually 60-90 days before Halloween, we would start sending each other Halloween cards and treats. Who will do that with me this year? Ed simply loved life in a big way.
Best of all, Ed loved me. My life is so much richer for knowing him. When my time comes, I know Ed will be waiting for me with bear hug and a "Hey, Babe!" Goodbye dear friend, I miss you already.
The miraculous and wonderful thing is that I had the chance to see him in Memphis only 2 weeks ago. A little over 3 weeks ago, a partner in the firm's Charlotte office asked me who might be the appropriate person from our office to go with him to try and secure business from a Memphis based company. I asked who he was meeting with and told him that maybe I knew someone in the legal department since I went to undergrad and grad school in Memphis. I was not the person he had originally selected to make this trip but the person he asked had other commitments. He asked if I would go.
Ed lived in Memphis and I immediately wrote him when I knew I would be flying in on Thursday and be available to stay the weekend. I have other friends in town that I really should spend time with but it was really Ed I wanted to see. 23 years ago we lived in the same condo complex and, along with my then boss Carol (who encouraged me to go to law school), we became fast friends. Ed never married but had a vast circle of friends. He helped thousands of students at Memphis State designing their graduate school programs. He remained a very active alum of his college fraternity and was a huge supporter of Memphis State basketball. Despite his many activities and social connections, he always managed to make me feel like I was the most special person in his life when I was with him. He and Carol were at my wedding to Jim 7 years ago and although we didn't talk often, every time we did it, was as if no time had passed.
When I contacted Ed 3 weeks ago, he told me he was supposed to be visiting friends in Indiana when I was coming but he was having a biopsy and depending on the results, he might be in Memphis. He would not tell me what was wrong because he really didn't know himself. He found out a few days later that he had terminal liver cancer with a tumor that was inoperable. He told me "good news - I'll be here when you come and I'll tell you what is going on when you get here." He thought he had about a year to live but there was a new drug they wanted to try to shrink his tumor. It cost $4000 a month and his insurance wold not cover the initial months. His doctors were trying to get the drug company or a non-profit to subsidize the treatments.
God knew that Ed and I needed to see each other one last time. He put us both in Memphis out of the blue. We met for dinner on Friday and talked, laughed, ate, reminisced. He said he was not in any pain. He was very yellow so I knew it was bad but he was the same wonderful Ed. Ed always called me "Babe" with his deep baritone and being with him, I remembered how much I loved that. We had our favorite cheese enchiladas at Molly's and laughed about how I always seem to drop food on myself and how his old dog Dudley bit me in the hip one time and made me afraid of Afghan hounds. He took me to where we used to live. He came back to the hotel and we sat up talking about books and movies and artists and his friends. On Saturday we went to breakfast, he drove me around MSU and Rhodes. We went to the book store and then picked up Carol. We headed downtown to Mud Island and to the Rendezvous for ribs. We drove around mid-town, marveled at the architecture, caught up. Again we laughed and told each other how much we meant to each other and we talked about getting together at the beach in the fall. It was not a good bye visit. I think we all fully expected to see each other again very soon.
Last Saturday, the toxins built up in his body to a point where it affected his brain. He apparently fell into a coma at home and was found Sunday morning. The doctors assured his friends that he did not feel any pain. He passed with his fraternity brothers, dear friends and his sister keeping vigil. I got the call Monday from his very close friend, Joe. I haven't seen or spoken to Joe in at least 20 years but he knew I was special to Ed just as I know about all the special people in Ed's life even though I never met most of them. Dottie - he loved working with you. Beverly - he adored you and your children. Joe and Gary - he loved your trips to St. Louis with Carol at Christmas. Joe, Ed talked on and on about your new dog. Tony and Michelle - Ed was so proud of the two of you and was looking forward to your wedding in a few months. Carol, he loved your sophistication and smarts and your down to earth temperament and sense of humor.
Ed had very high expectations of people but he loved his friends deeply. He did everything with gusto. He loved good food, good music, good art. He loved his school, his town, his family, his co-workers. He introduced me to Mozart and Pavarrati, George Rodrigue and gourmet large crystal brown sugar. He wasn't wild about children but he loved my Marshall. He loved his post-retirment job as the train conductor at the Memphis zoo. He loved the Mid-south fair and tolerated my passion for corn dogs and the freak show. He loved his dog, Dudley the biter, and the dogs of his friends. He loved Halloween as much or more than me. Usually 60-90 days before Halloween, we would start sending each other Halloween cards and treats. Who will do that with me this year? Ed simply loved life in a big way.
Best of all, Ed loved me. My life is so much richer for knowing him. When my time comes, I know Ed will be waiting for me with bear hug and a "Hey, Babe!" Goodbye dear friend, I miss you already.
posted by Our Family at
7:47 PM
1 Comments:
Mary Li,
My thoughts and prayers are with you in the loss of your dear friend.
Love,
Carol
Post a Comment
Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]
<< Home