Fish Eyes and Falling

When we were in Vietnam, we had the good fortune to be able to take a 2 day cruise on Halong Bay on a junk boat. This was one of the highlights of the trip for us. The karst mountains rising like the backs of dragons out of a calm misty sea are exactly like every beautiful painting of the region you have seen. We took this little side trip 6 days after meeting and adopting Hunter and its where we started really learning who he is. He was fascinated by our shipmate John’s cellular phone. He spoke non-stop in clear Vietnamese to our young guide who had the patience of a saint. He cautiously watched Marshall play video games from a distance and willingly played tea party with Lily and another patient young man from England. It was on this boat he pitched his first full blown screaming, crying and kicking fit when Jim tried to put him down for a nap. It was his first time on a boat and his first swim in the ocean. We also learned that Hunter loves what is apparently a delicacy in Vietnam – fish eyes!

We were served really wonderful meals on the boat (thank you tour operator Kangaroo Café based in Hanoi) but the most memorable was dinner with a whole broiled fish. Yes, it was served with the head on. Hung watched anxiously as we and the other guests served ourselves beautiful white flaky filets. He ate his with little interest but kept staring at the fish head. He quietly tugged at Jim and pointed to the fish eyes and back to himself. We finally realized he wanted the eyes. When Jim gave him the go ahead, Hunter dug them out and popped them in his mouth so fast, we didn’t have time to be horrified. He then slunk to the other tables to ask our travels mates if he could have theirs. We were traveling with people from England, Ireland and Australia. None of us were too keen on looking at or eating the eyes.

Flash forward to two nights ago. Hunter, Lily and I stopped at a new fish market on the way home. It backs up to the bay and boats dock and unload their fresh catch throughout the day. The owner convinced me to try a fresh hog fish and he passed it to someone in the back to filet for me. I saw Hunter closely examining all the fish. “Would you like the eyes?” I asked. Hunter’s entire face lit up and he nodded vigorously – “yes, Momma!” The owner was nonplussed by my strange request and his filet guy came out to verify that yes, I really wanted the eyes and would take what he could give me. He promptly handed me a bag of about 12 eyes. I quickly put them in the bag with the other fish and tried not to think about it. No, they couldn’t tell me how to cook fish eyes but suggested the Internet. I “Asked Jeeves” and he doesn’t know how to cook them either! Apparently they are normally cooked as part of the fish and not on their own. My dear husband said he would make the eyeballs and he broiled them with olive oil , salt and pepper. Marshall gagged and had to get up from the table. I had to look away but Jim and Lily watched in fascination as the boy gleefully ate one after another, sucking the eye from the cartilage. He thought it was great fun to put the empty round cartilage on his fingers like rings. “Momma – eyes SO good!” he exclaimed repeatedly. “Eyes – Awesome” he said as he gave us several thumbs up. And no, Hunter would not share them when Jim jokingly asked him, “Some for Daddy?”

After dinner we went for a walk. He insisted on holding my hand. Several times he looked up at me and very earnestly said, “Momma, thank you! Eyes good!” and rubbed his tummy. When we got home and he was ready for bed, he climbed into bed and laid on my stomach and again said thank you. I made my son feel like a special prince and he was so very grateful. I earned at least 100 good Mommy points that night.

I am falling more in love with this child every day. Who knew – fish eyes would solidify our bond? I have a feeling they will be saying, "here comes that eyeball lady again!” at our local fish market. Ah...the things we do for love!