Happy Chinaversary! 3 years

It has been two months since we adopted Hung and next week will mark 3 years since we adopted Lily in China on June 26, 2006.

How can the time have gone so fast? It seems like yesterday we saw this sweet baby girl being brought into the room at the Civil Affairs Office in Guangdong China. She was so very tiny and beautiful...and scared. She boo hooed when I handed her off to Daddy but settled down when Marshall began to feed her one cheerio at a time. We marveled at her dexterity and how she plucked cheerios from Marshall's hand - her first ever solid food! Then she started eating rice a grain at a time, then noodles a noodle at a time and hasn't slowed down since! :) Lily continues to shine like a beautiful ray of sunshine that lights up a room where ever she goes. She is smart, funny and kind. We are so thankful and blessed that she was chosen for us.

Last night we celebrated "Chinaversary" early with our annual family portrait and dinner out. Lily wanted spaghetti so it was Macaroni Grill. Poor Hung had more dental work done and the anesthesia had not completely worn off so his smile is a bit lopsided. Marshall is going to visit his Dad's family in Virginia for several weeks so we wanted to celebrate together before he leaves. Marshall wants to know why we don't have an "Americaversary" for him. Hmm... Maybe 4th of July!

In only 2 months, Hung has picked up a remarkable amount of English. We took him to our travel agent to explain Marshall is going away for a bit and she asked Hung questions in Vietnamese and he answered in English. She asked him if he wants to go back to Vietnam and he said no - he wants to stay here with Mommy and Daddy. That's good to know! Lately he has taken to yelling at Mom when he does not immediately get his way or he is aggravated at something. Not pleasant but we are working to correct it. Funny that he thinks it is ok to do it to me but not to Jim. More of that prior male dominated culture rearing its ugly head? Maybe it is a sign that he is comfortable enough now to feel secure?

We are headed to visit friends in Tennessee next week and spend some time with Uncle David's family. We hope Hung understands that we are coming back. He started pre-school with Lily last week and they are playing well, he is absolutely loving it and he has started calling himself "Hunter Duda." Lily is still struggling with jealousy when we show Hunter affection but its getting better day by day.

Welcome home Brian, Wendi and the newest arrival from Dong Nai province, their daughter An!

And if you need a reminder of God's amazing grace and that dreams do come true, just take a look at these pictures:

Lily's sad referral photo taken June, 2006 about 3 weeks before we met her in China

Our beautiful daughter - June, 2008Happy Family together at last - June, 2009

The New Normal

The end of the school year for Lily and Marshall is upon us and we were waiting for things to start to feel normal around here again. We could do with lots less screaming and crying from Lily every day, less teasing from Hung of his siblings and less closed bedroom doors from Marshall. We could use a full night's sleep with out Lily having a stomach ache or coming in the room just because. We could use some way to deal better with the stress. Adopting a 6 year old is MUCH different than adopting an 18 month old. And did I mention that Hung is as headstrong, smart and independent as his younger sister?

News flash courtesy of our fellow Dong Nai adoption friends - the old "normal" isn't coming back! What?! We liked the old normal (minus the awful wait for Lily and then for Hung!). We've been home 6 weeks and we kind of knew this in our hearts but didn't want to admit it to ourselves. According to the Morris family, who have "been there, done that" with 6 beautiful children, what we need to aim for is a "new normal" after adding a child to the family. Rob gave us a great analogy. Adding a child to a family is like putting a new object on the mobile that hangs over a baby crib - it throws the whole thing off kilter for a while until it eventually stabilizes. May not look like what it did before but it still works.

So, we try to use the screaming, crying, loud arguing between Hung and Lily as teaching moments. We keep trying to coax Marshall that he needs to spend time with his door open if he ever wants to trust his siblings. We continue to be patient with Hung's incessant boasting and teasing. Yes - we asked for it and yes we are so very grateful Hung is home. Although integrating him into the family is a challenge, it is so worth it. Yesterday he said his first complete unprompted 4 word sentence, "Mom, please go away!!" I think I was trying to get him to share something. :)

Today on the phone he told me for the first time in Vietnamese "Mom, I love you." Yes - things will settle out and be o.k.- in fact, very good. Congratulations to Marshall - our new middle schooler! Elementary school is officially over.

Lily at her end of the year pre-school circus

Clowning around with big brother

Lily with Ms. Graddy, her pre-school teacher

Hung with visiting neighbor Caleb who let Hung drive his Jeep! Not surprisingly, Hung tuned the car radio to a salsa station! The boy loves salsa music! He constantly turns to the TV to the salsa music channel.

Marshall gets the "Best Questions" Award from his teacher. Later we went to the beach with his class to celebrate the end of elementary school. Thanks to Granma Donna who watched Hung and Lily as her present to Marshall.

Marshall and his best buddy, Max on the last day of school.

What Hung and Lily look like together 30-40 percent of the time. You don't want to see the 60-70% photo!